I AM NAD!

It has been brought to my attention that my treatment on this blog of one of my friends has been a little cruel.

For starters I compared his face to that of a well-known vegetable.

Then I published a personal and private email on the blog, for the sole purpose of ridiculing him.

Finally I raided his personal and private online-photo collection and published two photos that present my friend in what some people might call an unflattering light. It has been suggested that I - at the very least - remove said photographs and presumably issue a lengthy public apology and an argument that the camera actually does lie a bit!

Clearly I'm not going to do that because - well - they make me laugh.

A lot.

They are funny.

As a sop though I shall tell you a little tale about an ugly duckling that I like to call Nad. By day Nad is the perfect human being: witty, generous, nice-smelling and above all, incredibly handsome. However, unbeknownst to all those striking good looks are nothing but an elaborately constructed LIE! Strip away hours of meticulously applied make-up, a certain amount of prosthetic work and relax the face that's continuously tensed and Lo! ... he's HIDEOUS!

I am not proud. I'll let you into a secret: I AM NAD!

NAD IS ME!

(we're even, you yam-faced goon!)